Almost-Athletic
Some people are athletic, but many more are only almost-athletic. You might find athletic people in athletic jobs (football players, figure skaters, movers, etc.), and almost-athletes in almost-athletic jobs (electricians, plumbers, meter maids) but also many people do athletic things on their own time to make up for sitting down all day (cycling, tennis, swimming). Almost-athletes compete at the beginner, amateur, or club level, if they compete at all. They sometimes buy sport magazines and watch their own sport on television.
Almost-athletes annoy both athletes and non-athletes. They annoy athletes because they can't keep up with the real athlete (they become a source of embarrassment if they are seen together doing the same sport the athlete is expert in). They annoy non-athletes because they seem to never stop talking about sports.
A person's speech is revealing when it comes to athleticism. Typically one talks about sports and activities in proportion to how important sports or athletic activities are in their lives. While non-athletes never discuss sports, and athletes never stop talking about their sport, almost-athletes can turn the "sports-talk" on an off, almost at will.
Types/Categories
1. An almost-jock: Almost a professional in at least one sports. (These people may have tried hard earlier to become an athlete, but they then gave up, or they were too short or too heavy to turn pro, or they made "the wrong" choices earlier in life.)
2. Almost-commentator: Knows almost-all there is to know about a sport. (May be a young athlete-wannabe, a former athlete, or a former almost-jock, or a female bartender that has worked on her "guy talk.")
3. Almost-sick: Participates in athletics only because they must prevent themselves from becoming even more unfit than they already are. (You see these people everywhere because they stick out: overweight people in gyms, tennis players that hit the ball over the fence.)
4. Almost-interested: Enjoys sports just as they do almost-everything in life, and because their time is spread so thinly amongst many activities, they never become proficient at any one sport, or really become athletic. (Most people fall into this category.)
5. Athletic in name only: Participates in an activity that is called a "sport," but is not a sport (or is only a sport for the horse they ride).
Examples of people being almost-athletic:
